Horoscope for today: The Bottom Line
Sometimes a good memory can be a curse -- try to let go of the past and move on.
In Detail
Sometimes a good memory can be a blessing, and sometimes it can be a curse -- like today, when a fading friendship makes you wistful for the way things used to be. People enter and exit your life, and sometimes exits are for the best. Do not think of ending a relationship as a failure.
When i came home after Kuya Cris' vigil, I felt exhausted, emotionally. how can he leave just like that? i hated him for leaving, i hated him for not telling me anything about the thing that caused his demise, i hated him for not saying goodbye.
but how can i hate him when he's now gone, when all i have are good memories of a good man, a wonderful friend, a caring kuya.
Kuya Cris is one person who'll talk to you with random questions: anong favorite color mo? eh pagkain? musta na lovelife mo? he gave you pieces of advice when you need it. He is indeed friendly because i never knew anyone who disliked him. he laughs that laugh of his, he goes to school early and opens up the student council office. i see him every morning and he gives me a hi eveytime, it never fails. it was incomprehensible that the last smile, the last wave and the final goodbye that he gave me would be really it. had i known, i would have hugged him, let him know how thankful i am that he touched my life, that he made me his friend and treated me like the little sister that he never had.
i hated myself that i took his liberty of using my multiply account to look at that one person's blog. i hated myself for changing it and now how i wish i could tell him my password. since i couldn't do that anymore, i would change back my password to the one he knew. with that, i will remember him everytime i open my multiply, then i'll never forget him.
To the people who inflicted this pain, your hands are stained with the blood of this man. i hope you suffer the pain that you caused kuya cris and also the pain that you caused on the people that loved him multiply it a thousand times. i hope you suffer an agonizing death, one that's slow and utterly painful that you'd just wish that you were dead. Damn you all.
Kuya cris, i know you won't want this but i'm sorry, right now, that's how i feel. i'm sorry for changing my password. thank you for the laughs, the moments, the thoughts, the friendship. kuya cris, ako din marunong mag-advice sana sinabi mo sa akin ang desisyon mo, napigilan sana kita, alam mo namang magaling akong mangumbinsi di ba? ano naman itsura jan sa kinalalagyan mo? i'm sure masaya ka na, share mo sa amin ang happiness na nararamdaman mo jan ha. basta kahit alm mong nakokornihan ako dito sa sasabihin ko, alam mo din namang totoo to, di kita makakalimutan at i love you.
Goodbye and i'll see you again.
all my love. xox
